'Good Grief': Dan Levy responds to not seeing movies where friendships are 'central' to the story

Writer, director and actor Dan Levy, and actors Ruth Negga and Himesh Patel, spoke to Yahoo Canada's Elisabetta Bianchini about the film Good Grief on Netflix, which puts friendships at the centre of the story.

Video transcript

ELISABETTA BIANCHINI: So Dan, I want to start with you. I think grief is a really, I think, awkward thing to see on screen sometimes, just because everyone grieves differently. So when you want to go write this, what was kind of your goal? What were some of the things you were thinking about in terms of, I really kind of want to shape it in this way?

DAN LEVY: I mean, I think I wanted to use it more as like a springboard to talk about friendship than anything else. And I think it was in the process of figuring that out that you, you come to realize that it is - it can be an incredibly isolating experience. But in my case, you know, I'm - I've been single for a long time, my friends are, you know, aside from my actual family, like my friends are the people that I confide in. They're the people that have encouraged me to keep trying. Or, you know - especially when you work in a very high stakes situation, like, you know, this job is tough, and it can take a real emotional toll on you. Friendships are the life raft that comes to save you when you need it the most. So, you know for me, it was like, yes, about the isolation, but you had to show the isolation to then show the community. And in the process of that, you know, realizing that grief is all around us, and that everyone is grieving something, and we just might not show it on the outside.

And I think, you know, we're in a culture right now that I think is particularly cruel, and particularly judgmental, and particularly shallow in the judgment that we place on people. It's a very reactive culture, social media culture, of knowing nothing about a person, but pointing and placing judgment. So this idea of, I don't know, like, really exploring what it is to have friends that understand you and are there for you.

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ELISABETTA BIANCHINI: I think sometimes your closest friends are the people who can say, yeah it's okay to not have things figured out, but it'd be really great if you could start to figure things out now, would be lovely. Was that nice for you to be able to explore with this character?

HIMESH PATEL: Yeah, it was. It felt like, you know, a culmination of everything that he's been feeling for a long time, but been holding in. Because he's kind of the, the one that's been keeping it kind of running to some degree, you know, and sort of absorbing everything that's been going on with the other two. But eventually, you know, there comes a point where you can't quite do that anymore. But again, it's an example of, it's so valuable to have those people in your life when you, when you can be that honest with them, and maintain a friendship, you know, and if anything strengthen a friendship, or a relationship. It's scary. It's not always easy. You know, I'm not great at confrontation and sort of being that honest about that. And actually, that's something I've gained from this process of doing this movie, is sort of learning that that's something that's so important to any valuable relationship in your life.

RUTH NEGGA: He's gotten such a hard job, Thomas, don't you think? It's like the hardest job, is to be the one who goes, ‘Lads come on, like, you know, maybe we should go to bed now.’ No on wants to be that person. And yet, and yet just that conversation that they have on that ferris wheel is like, that was an NAR, no acting required - but like, I remember, like as Ruth, thinking, that is actually - this is the maturity that you require at a certain age. Maybe not, maybe it's a maturity you require from your friendships, groups that like, do hold you accountable for your own mess, but also your responsibility for the mess within the group, you know what I mean. That's, that's - for me that's like what, I mean, I'm sure therapists call it like doing, you know, doing like - working on your friendships, doing the housework. Do you know what I mean, it's the work. Exactly. But it matters.

DAN LEVY: And I think for me, it was just, I love my friends, my friends are the great loves of my life. I think when you don't have a great love of your life, that is where - those are the people who are. And I haven't been able to see movies that focus on friendships being a central, justifiable place to tell a story. You know, friendships are always on the peripheral of romantic comedies, or certain dramas, where, you know, the audience is rooting for love. I have just been so craving a story that is a love story about friendships, giving them the space to breathe, and to show kind of the complexity of what it is to be - to have close friends as an adult. So I was just - I feel very grateful for the opportunity to tell a story that I hope will comfort people in the sense that, we don't see these stories a lot.

The relationship dynamic between friendships never gets to be really explored in movies, because your real estate as a friend, having played one, is small. And that's fine when the focus is, like, love. But I've alway, even in a lot of the romantic comedies and dramas that I've watched, the friends are the characters that I'm thinking like, ‘Can I get a spinoff with them?’ Like how do I - so to take that and give it the time it deserves felt very special.”